Sunday, January 31, 2010

It's been a while...

I seem to be able to find time to update facebook (which only takes a few minutes) more frequently than this blog...but I have so much to tell!
First, here's picture proof of how nothing in this house is out of reach of our middle child the monkey:

This is a child who had a gross-motor delay at 18 months old...I'd say that he has made up for lost time in that area!

I recently took Connor back to his Infectious Disease specialist, who is the dr managing his Primary Immune Deficiency. His lab work showed very similar results as the last times we've checked his immune function, he still has a t-cell deficit which puts him at increased risk of viran and fungal infections (and secondary bacterial infections). But the good news is, his t-cell function appears normal. So basically he doesn't have enough of an immune system, but what he does have, works like it's supposed to. This type of immune deficiency allows him to "learn", in other words, most kids need to be exposed to an illness once or twice and they'll develop immunity to it. Connor has to be exposed numerous times, but he does eventually develop proper immunity. So although he will always have a t-cell deficit, he will appear to "grow out of" his immune deficiency as he ages.

His labs did show an IgM deficiency that has never been there before, for now we're assuming that it was a one time test anomaly, but we'll be watching to see what it does.

Connor ages out of Early Intervention on March 3rd when he turns 3 years old, and he transfers to public schools and will receive services and therapies through an IEP (Individualized Education Plan). We have started the transition process (which includes a lot of testing and gathering of records, etc). Our local school can not handle Connor's needs, but we found a school in a neighboring distric that has a full time sign language interpreter in the classroom, as well as 4 other hearing impaired kids. I visited the school and was VERY impressed with the program! Connor will get full time verbal and full time sign in this classroom! He will be with kids just like him, who are trying to learn to be verbal, but for now rely on sign. I have no doubt that it is the best environment for him, that in any other environment he will have more delays, not just in his speech development, but more important in his social/emotional development. My number one goal for him in preschool is for it to be a positive experience for him so he learns to like school. If he is effected by the learning disabilities that are so prevalent in his syndrome, then I want to set the stage now. I want to set him up for success, rather than failure.

We'll find out all the details over the next few weeks about sending him to this out of district school. Wish us luck!!

I have more to talk about...but currently have two children sitting in my lap, which is rather challenging to type!!! I'll be back later with more pictures, too!

Monday, January 4, 2010

3, 7, and 2010

It's all about the numbers, and the stories behind them.

3...Gavin is 3 months old now. He has really turned a corner and proven that the "4th trimester" really does exist for some babies. These last 3 months he's challenged us in ways that his brothers didn't, he was what some people would consider a "high needs" baby, one that resisted being put down, one that resisted sleeping unless being held, one that seemed to have "colicky" episodes even. I've always heard of babies like this, but had never experienced it. Ian and Connor were rather easy to care for, their needs were obvious and easy to meet, they were pleasant to be around, they fell into their own routines and preferences smoothly.


Gavin, not so much. While he's undeniably a CUTE baby, he's also been difficult. But that is all changing, and rather suddenly! He now is a much more laid-back, easy-going baby, content to be put down to look at a toy or watch his brothers play. He'll even sit in a swing for short periods! I'm a believer that babies NEED to be held, need to be in their mommy's or daddy's arms much of the time, need the comfort and security. It's not fair to a baby for them to be evicted from their uterine home and suddenly expected to self-soothe. HOWEVER, reality is that this is a busy family, I have two other children, a house to clean, meals to cook, etc. So on occasion, I need to be able to put Gavin down. Thankfully, he now lets me!
Gavin even is tolerating his carseat now! We are an on-the-go family, often going places not just for fun but out of necessity. Connor has many dr appts and therapies, Ian has many activities, mommy and daddy have errands to run. So Gavin disliking his carseat was very trying to us!! But he recently has concluded that it's not that bad after all, and will even play with a toy or take a nap when we're out and about. So life is good, as it always has been and hopefully always will be! Each day brings its new challenges, and we're continuing to do our best to trudge through them.

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7...Jim and I celebrated 7 years of marriage on Jan 3rd! What a ride it's been, just like our vows "for better or for worse." In 7 years we've gone from being college students to living overseas, to becoming parents--times 3!--and everything in between. We've experienced thrills and successes; and near debilitating pain. Through it all, the constant has been our love.

For us, and I'd hazard to say for all couples, love is not enough for a couple to last. I love Jim because we have a relationship built from mutual respect, understanding, and selflessness. We're not perfect, but we accept each other's faults. Marriage takes WORK, and for 7 years, we've been putting in the work.

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2010...Happy New Year!!! We spent a week in Michigan for Christmas, and the trip went rather smoothly! All three boys were well behaved, there were very few fits or tantrums, very few tears, and lots of laughs!! Here's the boys on Christmas Eve night, in their matching Christmas jammies. Only Ian understands who Santa is and was truly excited to go to bed that night. Connor and Gavin were pretty oblivious to it all! One thing Connor was NOT oblivious to was the snow!! Although he could hardly move in his snowsuit, he really liked playing outside! As did Ian...and at nearly 5 years old, he is now old enough to really have fun outside, digging in the snow, making snow angels, sledding, throwing snowballs. He even jumped on my mom's trampoline in his snow boots! Look at the fun they had ruding on a toboggon behind the 4-wheeler!!
Connor learned the sign for "snow" and was very sad to get back to Ohio to see no snow here. I think Ian understands that it WILL snow here, he just has to wait a while longer.

So another year has passed, and although it had its fill of surprises, it was a very good one!! I'm excited to see the boys grow, explore, and experience life this coming year. I'm excited to see what life might have in store for me and Jim. I'm excited to just...live life!!!

Friday, December 4, 2009

2 months

Gavin is 2 months old. I can hardly remember when Ian was 2 months old, it seems like a lifetime has passed since then. And in essence, I am a completely different person than I was then. When I compare my life 5 years ago to my life today, I realize how far we've come, how far we have yet to go, and how incredibly, wonderfully blessed we truly are.


Things have been busy, as always it seems, the last two months. Gavin was born, we celebrated Halloween, celebrated Thanksgiving, and now I'm back to work and we're getting ready for Christmas. I never realized until I was an adult how little time there is between those three holidays!! It seems like we had barely bought pumpkins when it was time to buy a turkey, and then suddenly we're putting up our Christmas tree. I always thought that Tuesday came after Monday, yet lately it seems that I blink an eye and it's already Sunday night again. I have to find a way to slow down more, enjoy life more, enjoy my KIDS more!! I've been making a point of having quiet time with the two bigger boys more frequently, whether we're just cuddling, or reading a book, or talking about their days. My kids amaze me, they truly do.


Some of you may have heard already, but I have signed up to participate in Team In Training, which is part of the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. Go to www.teamintraining.org for more information. Basically, I have commited to fundraise $1700 in the next 5 months while I train to run a marathon in support of cancer research. Team in Training provides coaches, mentors, hotel the night before the race, meals the day before and day of, and an entire team of other runners and supporters while I train and raise money for their cause. I chose to run the half marathon in Cincinnati called The Flying Pig www.flyingpigmarathon.com on May 2nd. I'm doing this because I want/need to lose my baby weight and get in shape, and because I wanted to do it with a team and for a cause. I have a webpage set up, if you are interested in donating or tracking my progress, please visit! http://pages.teamintraining.org/soh/flypig10/sblock Every dollar helps, not just me, but the people who are effected by cancer. Maybe you know someone and you want to donate in their honor. Please tell me and I'll add their name to my jersey on race day.

In other news...we are looking forward to a trip to Michigan for Christmas this year. I'm trying to stay optimistic about travelling with that far with 3 boys udner age 5 in the middle of winter!! Ian has been GREAT lately, really blossoming into a wonderful little boy. Connor, though, has entered his version of the "terrible twos", which while nothing like Ian's were, are still challenging in their own right. Please please please, anyone that we're coming to visit, brush up on a little bit of ASL www.aslpro.com Connor understands a lot of verbal speech, but still relies on ASL for his expressive speech. In other words, he might understand you, but you won't understand him. It will likely be this way for several more years, so visit that webpage once in a while and challenge yourself to learn a few more signs!

That's all the news for now, everyone stay safe as winter weather starts to hit!!

Sunday, November 22, 2009

A preview of our family pictures!

Here are just a few of our family pictures taken today, more to come I promise!




Sunday, November 15, 2009

Baby smiles, priceless!

I love the newborn smiles, they're so goofy and so beautiful! I was laughing at how awkward Gavin is at times, and Jim put it perfectly, he said "You take something as complex as the human body and try to figure out how to work it in only 6 weeks!" Yep, he's right! Gavin is learning how to use his body, and we're getting some cute pictures while he experiments :)

Big grins...

Found his tongue!

Laughing at daddy!

The world is a hilarious place to a 6 week old!
Here he's looking at one of the dogs who was standing just out of the camera's view.

He was laughing at Ian here!

He can't figure out his eyes yet, he tries to focus on something, then they cross, and they often get "stuck" like this! Jim says he's tempted to smack the side of his head to "unstuck" his eyes (joking, people, of course we won't hit our baby!!)


Darn those eyes!!
We are scheduling family pictures soon, either this weekend or the weekend after Thanksgiving. We're going through a private photographer this time, hopefully with the extra time and one-on-one attention (vs the mall where you're ushered in and out in 15 minutes whether your baby is crying or not!) we're hoping to get some good shots of ALL of us together! We'll see how it goes :)

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

In a complete circle...

SO, here we go again, back to where we started. Well, sort of. Connor went back to the cleft palate team today, and he was diagnosed with exactly the thing that I suspected which is why we got referred to that team in the first place!!! 2 years ago I was told that Connor did NOT have a submucous cleft palate, today we discovered that he likely does.

I ran across the term Submucous Cleft Palate when I was researching the feeding issues Connor had as an infant. I mentioned my research to his pulmonologist (who just happened to be the next dr we saw after I had researched) and he referred us to the cleft team. The surgeon on the team completely brushed us off at that first appt, saying "Connor can't possibly have a submucous cleft palate because he doesn't have a bifid uvula."

Today at Connor's appt, while looking in Connor's mouth, he said to a med student who was with him, "see that bifid uvula? That's the first sign you look for in a submucous cleft." Huh??

So here comes a lesson in submucous clefts and bifid uvulas, and an explanation of what's likely going on with Connor.

Here's a picture of a normal palate with the anatomy labeled (although this person's tonsils are rather large!) With your tongue you can feel the roof of your mouth (your hard palate) and if you reach back far enough (hoe you're not tongue-tied!) you can feel where the bone ends and the soft palate begins. Connor's hard palate is structurally normal, although is rather narrow and very high/arched. His soft palate, though, has never functioned correctly. We've known this since he was 4 weeks old and had his first swallow study.

If the soft palate does not form correctly, the uvula can have a bifid appearance like this one:And here's a drawing illustrating it:The bifid uvula is not a problem in and of itself, it's just a possible sign of a larger problem. Connor's uvula has always appeared normal, but today he was crying when they were looking in his mouth, and every time he inhaled, his uvula took on a slight bifid appearance. Here's why him crying was significant...here's a picture of the anatomy in the mouth (side view):See how behind the soft palate is the back wall of the throat, and where it connects to the nasal passageways? When you inhale through your nose, the soft palate is relaxed to allow air to pass through your nose into your lungs. When you inhale through your mouth (or exhale through your mouth, as pictured here) the soft palate is supposed to close the back of the throat so the air goes only down (or up), and not also out your nose. The same thing is supposed to happen when you swallow (so food doesn't come out of your nose) and when you speak. Here's an illustration of that, the first picture shows the soft palate closing correctly so speech sounds only come out of the mouth, the second picture shows the soft palate closing incorrectly so sounds are coming out of both the nose and the mouth (see the arrows?):So the bifid uvula is a sign of a muscular problem in the soft palate, and Connor's speech progression is also indicative of a soft palate problem (there are certain consonant and vowel sounds he ca'nt make before they require him to move his soft palate. For example, make the long E sound, can you feel your palate move? The same with the hard G and hard C or K sounds.)

So what does this all mean (besides the fact that I'm highly annoyed that doctors STILL aren't listening to me when I've proven again and again that I know how to research my kid and I often diagnose him long before they do!!) For now it doesn't mean anything, if he has a submucous cleft, he's too young to have it corrected anyway. The dysfunction of the soft palate is called Velopharyngeal Insufficiency (VPI), and that also can be corrected but he is too young and too small. Besides, some kids with submucous clefts and VPI are able to compensate and never need the corrective surgery. So for now we keep doing what we've been doing, which is heavy speech therapy and assistive communication (in our case we chose sign language in place of assistive communication devices). There is a specialty clinic in Cincinnati that specializes in these kinds of palate problems, and I will definitely take Connor there for any repair that he may need, especially since I really don't like the head of this team here in Dayton (mostly because he's brushed me off so many times!)

Thus ends this cleft palate lesson!














Sunday, November 8, 2009

Me and the boys...picture attempt #1

I remember now why we PAY someone to take our pictures!!! It's hard work to get just two little boys looking in the same direction--and maybe even smiling!--but now to get three?? It might be impossible for a while :) I had Jim try today, though, and here's the results:

Take 1...Ian wasn't looking, Connor was crying.

Take 2...Ian was blinking, I was kind of hunched over, Connor was still unhappy.

Take 3...Ian was looking, but making a weird face, I was caught in half-blink (or something!), and Gavin was trying to latch onto Connor's face!!
We'll keep trying!! Someone asked for an upclose picture of me and Gavin's face to compare to the last post's picture of Jim and Gavin's faces. I'll see what I can do tonight...he usually has a happy time right before bed, maybe I'll try then. I think Gavin looks more like Jim than either of the other boys did. He definitely has my chin and his eyes are more similar to mine than Jim's, but they're not exactly like mine either. And since he kept his dark hair, he just looks like Jim I think!! I dreamed several times when I was pregnant that we'd get a red-haired baby, but it looks like I was wrong, maybe he'll be a brown-haired kid!!